‘Tis the season my friends and the annual parade of christmas parties begins ce soir for the first lady and I. I’d love to invite you all to this soiree but I feel the need to protect the other party go’ers from the throng of paparazzi who would flock to cover such a shin dig.
So in lieu of sending directions I’ll just gladly promise to behave myself instead, which might be a tad difficult if you are a gambler of sorts. The trends of my past performances at this particular party don’t support a clean night for this fella. In the past I’ve consumed too many adult libations and have become that guy on a number of occasions.
In many of these unfortunate instances I’ve had a few running mates to take some of the heat off me. However the waiver wire would suggest that tonight there’s a major scratch before post time. One of my pals, The Turk, is out 6-8 days with shingles. This is going to put a huge dent into me not being that guy this evening. The Turk is usually a Vegas line 2-1 to be that guy. He has a laundry list of party offences that aren’t limited to only the yuletide season variety. No matter the occasion, he’s the guy you look to when trying to finish in 2nd place for the nomination of that guy of the night.
Wish me luck friends.